A well structured essay with some good scientific theory.
The main area to improve on would be in the analysis of the results. It is clear that the results show water moves in to and out of the cell and different concentrations but you repeat this point many times.
The aim of the experiment is fairly ambiguous also, investigating the effect of osmosis does not really give you a purpose or issue to solve; investigating the effect of osmosis to determine the water potential of the potato cells would be better.
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